If Helmet Begins to Smoke, Seek Shelter & Cover Head with Hands...
At our local thrift store yesterday, my sister and I found this gem:
The Helmet of Certain Death!™
I can't remember who first noticed the disclaimer, since we both fell down laughing. Luckily, neither of us was wearing the helmet when this happened, so we both survived the experience.
You know, when your helmets warrant a safety advisory, maybe it's time to get start manufacturing something less, oh, life-threatening.