Eireann is the megalomaniac behind this little conspiracy. She is the person who sits behind you in a theater, alternately kicking your chair and announcing in a loud voice what will happen next. While aiming for world domination, she practices her dictatorial skills by ruining everyone else's good time. However, she might be swayed to give it all up and turn over a new leaf if you buy one of her shirts, or get George Clooney to agree to a night with her (by choice or by force - it's all good).